RoyII

Now I have never considered myself to be Scrooge like, but there is one particular Yuletide festivity that I can only describe as a load of old humbugs - the Christmas dinner.

The sight of the pale, flaccid, dry pieces of Turkey on the plate is enough to kill even the healthiest of appetites, and the 25th of December is often the excuse to launch an overwhelming attack of the worst vegetables known to man, yes you've guessed it...

...sprouts. These really are vile, and can only be the spawn of Satan. To be fair, my hatred of sprouts stems from a childhood trauma at school, when I was force fed the revolting vegetables by an over zealous dinner lady, whose ideas of spreading the Christmas Spirit probably originated from Dickensian times. Ever since then I have hated them, and since Turkey tastes almost as disgusting as sprouts themselves, the Christmas meal does absolutely nothing for me.

What has always surprised me is that how many people put up with stomaching this repellent fare. A lot of friends and relatives have admitted to sharing my view, and when I ask them why they keep buying it, the answer is always the same - it is traditional. This has always struck me as a bit of a lame argument as Public Hangings and Corporal Punishment were also once traditional, but no one wants to maintain them!

I would much rather have a Pot Noodle and a pint.

Happy Christmas!

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Posted by: Roy2    in: My entries

Modified on December 20, 2007 at 1:01 PM

Last Friday showed signs of promise. I had been given a phone number by a girl for the express reason of calling her to arrange a date.

Later that evening I went to a friends birthday celebration in Clapham, and Saturday proved to be equally busy, so this, coupled with a bit of shyness on my part, meant that I didn't make the call until early Sunday evening.

She seemed friendly enough, but said that she couldn't go out on a date next week as she was busy preparing for a trip abroad that was starting next Friday. She will apparently be back from holiday just after New Year. She told me the day when she returns to the UK and we agreed a time for me to contact her to arrange to meet up.

After the event my immediate feeling was that it was a brush off. I also think I left it a bit too long to make the call. As always, things are always more complex than they should be...

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Posted by: Roy2    in: My entries

Modified on December 10, 2007 at 12:46 PM

...is one possible definition for Karaoke, in some cases at least. Never before has the slaughter of so many innocent songs been carried out by so few! It is almost criminal!

I have to say now that I don't do any of the singing. This is because of humanitarian reasons - the world is not quite ready for the full extent of my vocal talents. Also, I have yet to consume the volume of alcohol required for the courage to step up to the MIC.

The complete lack of singing ability does not faze everyone however. At a local pub pub, there is a lady who specialises in completely murdering ABBA tracks, and some of the vocalisation is on a par with that of the early stage X Factor rejects. On the whole though, the standard of singing is usually ok, and when you add this to the gratuitous displays of dad dancing that are common place at these events, the whole thing becomes surreally entertaining, especially after a few pints.

At the last one I attended, one of the barmaids got up on the stage to sing K T Tunstall's ‘Black Horse and The Cherry Tree'. Being a fan of the song, my expectations were not high, but she completely confounded them - she was really good! She was far the best singer I had ever heard at a Karaoke. It turned out that she is currently in a band, though I never found out the name. I hope she is around for the next one.

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Posted by: Roy2    in: My entries

Modified on December 3, 2007 at 5:42 PM